How to make the bedroom more intimate, even if you’re single

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Design Tips & Trends

We spend half our time in our bedrooms, whether it’s sleep, rest, or relaxation. The problem is that for many of us, our bedrooms become the catch all for everything- the laundry, the gifts, the packages, the books were reading, the 9 cups of water, the hand cream, and all the device chargers.

What if your bedroom was a space of intimacy.

A space that invites you into bed.

A place of respite.

An area you unwind and let go.

In this blog post, I will give you some of my go to tips to creating a space of intimacy in the bedroom.

Merriam Webster defines Intimate as :

a. marked by a warm friendship developing through long association

b. suggesting informal warmth or privacy

c. engaged in, involving, or marked by sex or sexual relations

As an interior decorator, if I’m trying to create a space of warmth and privacy, I am going to add layers of texture, low lighting, and heavy linens.

Let’s dive in to how you can accomplish this in your own primary suite.

 

Lighting in the Primary Bedroom

When it comes to lighting, I am a big fan of eliminating overhead lights and using only floor lamps, table lamps, and sconces. It highly depends on the space, but for most average sized rooms I recommend 3 or more light sources, excluding overhead lights. This gives you complete control over the level of lighting in the space as well as a softer, less stimulating ambience.

I love to incorporate sconces in the bedroom because they are practical in that they’re great for reading in bed and they leave the nightstands clear for clutter that tends to accumulate. Here are a few of my current favorite sconces:

Primary Bedroom Bedding

Bedding can be an affordable way to make a major upgrade to any bedroom. Some of my favorite bedding elements come from Target or and other budget friendly stores.

1. Light Bedding

I personally often prefer a light bedding set because it feels like a hotel, is easy to change decor around, and is able to be bleached. I typically layer sheets, a quilt, and a duvet cover on a bed. Sometimes I will often layer a throw blanket as well. These selections meet both the hot sleeper and the cold sleeper’s needs. If you want to know more about how to fully make a bed like a designer, you can read my blog post about that here. My favorite basic quilt is from Target and is around $100. It comes in many colors and I find it to be the perfect weight. You can see it in my bedroom here:

 

 

2. When is the last time you bought fresh sheets?

A new set of sheets can change the way your entire bed feels. I find most people have personal preferences for the fabric of their sheets, but I personally prefer a cotton blend. This is an area I do not recommend spending the big bucks. You can find great sheets at low price points with the idea of replacing them more frequently. My current go to sheets to purchase are about $60 from Target, are often on sale and come in many fabrics. You can find the sheet set here.

Curtains

Window coverings add so much texture to a room. If you’re wanting to make your bedroom more cozy, I highly recommend adding curtains. I like to think of curtains as a picture frame, they higlight the window and the natural light, not take away from the window or the view. I created an entire blog post on how to properly choose and hang curtains and you can read that here.

For the bedroom you will also want to consider whether or not you want to choose blackout curtains. Some people have difficulty sleeping and find blackout curtains immensely helpful, I personally have a hard time waking up in the morning and choose a light filtering curtain for my bedroom to help me wake up more naturally with the sun.

 

Rugs

A rug is an amazing way to add comfort and warmth to a bedroom. Two questions I get asked most often regarding rugs in the bedroom are:

  1. What size rug do I need? I recommend an 8 x 10 or 9 x 12 for a king size bed. The choice between the two will depend on how large the bedroom is. You do not want to go any smaller than 8 x 10 for a room with a king sized bed. For a queen size bed you can do a 5 x 7, but I recommend an 8 x 10 most often, again it depends on the room size.
  2. Can I place a rug on top of carpet? Yes! I often recommend a flatter weave rug on top of carpet and something that won’t slip and slide.

Clutter

The bedroom can often become a catch all space in the home. A place to fold laundry, leave half unpacked suitcases from you trip, a pile of books you plan to read, and the endless pile of mail and bills. 

If possible, try to keep the bedroom set to the intention of rest, intimacy, and relaxation. Avoid working in the bedroom if possible. Try to complete the laundry in the living room or another area of the home. Our spaces hold energy and when we tell the bedroom it can be a place of productivity, it does just that! 

I find that we all need boundaries and I think you’ll find boundaries in the bedroom to be incredibly helpful for quality sleep and rest.

If you’re not sure where to start, just try beginning by clearing off your nightstand! Take the water glass back to the sink, restack the books, tidy the cords, and see how that helps your mental state in falling asleep tonight. Start small and let the momentum and pay off build.

Plants/Florals

Lastly, fresh flowers and live plants can add so much life to your bedroom. If you’re not yet a plant parent, start with an empty vase on your nightstand or dresser and add the simple rhythm of picking up fresh florals when you grab your groceries each week. I LOVE Trader Joe’s floral section, I can usually grab something for under $6. It’s a small intention to start my week with something beautiful.

If you’re just beginning your indoor plant journey, I have a YouTube video here for you to watch and learn!

Intimacy in the Bedroom

The primary bedroom is a place or rest and through the small upgrades, your bedroom can be a space that you crave throughout the day, a place to relax at night and know that you’re safe. If you have any questions regarding turning your primary bedroom into a safe haven, I would love to hear!

Hey there, I'm Michelle!

Interior Decorator in Austin, TEXAS

As the founder and lead interior decorator here at Cultivate Your Space, I'm here to bring you the vision your space—from the baseboards to the ceilings—even if you have no idea at all what your decorating style is.

My job isn't just to design a space you love. I want your living space to be a source of peace, comfort, security, and joy...not just somewhere you lay your head each night.

Most Austin interior decorators only focus on how your space looks—but not me. I care about both how your space functions AND how it makes you feel.

Curating with intention

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